i wish i wrote this

"Loving You Is All I Know" by The Pretenders


I dont understand how the sun keeps shining,
And I dont understand why the seasons change,
And I dont have a clue,
What makes the rivers flow,
Loving You is All I know,

I cant tell you why stars come out in the evening,
And I cant tell you where they go when there gone,
And I dont have a clue,
What makes a flower grow,
Loving You is All I know,

Chorus:
I dont know how the world keeps on spinning round,
I dont know why the sky dont come falling down,
I just know that I would die without your touch,
I dont know why the tide,
needs to reach the shore,
I just know that I'll need you for, forever more,
Knowing that I guess I know enough,

I cant really say if there is a heaven,
but I feel like it's here when I feel you near me baby,
if angels are real,
They must know how I feel,
Cuz' Loving You Is All I Know

Chorus

I dont understand how the sun keeps on shining,
And I dont understand why the seasons change,
And I dont have a clue,
What makes the rivers flow,
Loving You is All I know,
Loving You is All I know.

if tomorrow never comes

I was watching the end of Crossing Jordan last week. I really didn't watch the whole episode, so I really don't know the whole story. I did, however, catch the end of it. Anyway, this girl was a con-artist. There was this guy that was "supposedly" her dad. That is what she told people. He ended up drowning 'cause he wanted to learn how to swim. He wanted to live as he was dying. He had lung cancer, but the girl didn't know until they told her in the end. I believe she ended up stealing the body. She confessed the man was not her father, but her lover. I believe she thought he was interested in another woman. They showed up at this house. She was getting ready to kick some ass. When she opened up the door, there were tons of flowers and a banner that said "Will you marry me?" She cried, but was happy at the same time. She now knew that he actually loved her.

I seen the advertisment for the Black Donnellys, a new show that is premiering tonight. I really can't remember all of it. I am drawing a total blank. Something along the same lines as what I posted above. Well, at least I know he loved me or something along the lines of that. Okay, I just watched the trailer for the series. The girl was like, "what if he dies and doesn't know I love him?"

Would you want to know if that person actually loved you? Would you feel better knowing that if you weren't together anymore? Or would you rather not know and just have your opinion even though it could be wrong? I don't know. I believe if I had a certain opinion, I would rather know the truth. It would make me feel better, since everything is not as what it seems. People can surprise you.

We should all take chances, but we don't. Tomorrow is never promised to anyone. Everyone just assumes they will get their "chance." Some may get it and some may not. I guess it depends on how lucky we are. Some get their chance and are fine, while some aren't as lucky. We should all take the advice, but I guess we would rather live in fear of the unknown.

Here is a song that goes along with what I am talking about. It is titled "If Tomorrow Never Comes."



Sometimes late at night
I lie awake and watch her sleeping
She's lost in peaceful dreams
So I turn out the lights and lay there in the dark
And a thought crosses my mind
If I never wake in the morning
Would she ever doubt the way I feel
About her in my heart

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
She must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

Cause I've lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed
So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
She must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

So tell that someone that you love
Just what you're thinking of
If tomorrow never comes

this is how i roll

Money makes the world go round. Never did I once see love pay the rent. What you can do during the during the day, you can do at night. Umm... I have a job interview tomorrow at Friedman's Jewelers. I hope I get it. I need a job, once again. I'm going out tomorrow. I have to or else I won't be sane. I haven't got to see my friends hardly any this week. I've seen them. Just not got to hang out with them. Maybe that is my fault? Nahh... I am loving this weather we are having. It is crazy to think it is supposed to snow next week. I love American Idol. It is boring though at times. I kind of hate how boys are on one night and girls on the other. I am really disappointed Paul Kim got voted off:( I really liked him, but his song sucked. My one friend is now talking to me again. It has been like a week and a half, but turns out they had a family emergency. Music and Lyrics is a good movie. I will definitely buy it when it comes on dvd. I am wayyyy behind on my mass media assignments. My goal is to take a lot of pictures this weekend. I wanted to go out tonight, but I had a feeling that wasn't going to happen. That's fine. I got a chance to watch CSI. Shew. I love writing blogs. I just believe no one reads them. Yes, I have complained about this before. If you are going to take the time to read it, at least leave some feedback. I like the exit song on American Idol. (Chris Daughtry-"Home"). I hope I see my besties this weekend. That would be awesome. I hope I get caught up with my school work. I want to see the movie "Number 23." That is just kind of odd that is my lucky number. I hate hate hate waiting. I don't like when people say they will call, and then don't. I like to think I honor my word. I want to have a good time this weekend. This blog is all over the place. I am just writing down whatever pops into my head. This past October and November, I didn't write blogs. I should have. Just to help me through. It would have been better than keeping what I was feeling inside. No wonder I broke down. I'm hungry. I'm outie. Next time, I will actually have a purpose for writing something.

to my friends...

MY FRIENDS: This is for all of you. You make my day brighter : )



I just want to say I love my friends dearly...

They are some of the best anyone could ever ask for. I believe I am truly blessed. I know I might not have much time left with some, since some will be graduating or moving away. I want to make as memories as I can, because I know I won't be seeing them on a regular basis. It is really a sad feeling, which is why I don't think about it. I tend to think about the happy times that I have spent with them, and the ones yet to come.

I am always there for my friends, doesn't matter if it is a favor or just someone needing to talk. They do the same for me. I really don't know how I would make it through this world without them. Maybe that is why I had a hard time in high school dealing with shit from people. I truly had two best friends (John and Desirae). That helped me get through.

Now I am in college, I love the people and all my new friends. I can truly count on them for anything. I can act stupid and they will love me the same, just as friends are supposed to do. I can cry and complain about guys and they will lend me their ear. They will give support and believe in me, when I won't believe in myself.

I have now made many best friends in college. I don't want to single anyone out or anything. But Brad, Ashley, T.J. and Erin... you guys are the greatest! To all my newly found friends, I can't wait to make more memories with you. I love meeting new people and having opportunites to interact socially with others. I'm glad I was given the chances I have been given. If I was still in the relationship I was once in, who knows where I might be now. I know I wouldn't have met the people I did. Everything happens for a reason, and I'm glad everything is working out like it did.

I've made some stupid mistakes in my time. It meant a lot to me when my friends were there to help me through it. It meant a lot to me when they would never complain about my complaining. Or however many times I made mistakes over and over again, they never stop liking me. They offer advice, and sometimes I will listen...but they never get mad when I don't. I wish I could express how much everyone of you mean to me. Whether if it is a email, text message, or a simple hello. I appreciate it : ) It truly makes my day brighter.

Thanks for being my shoulder to cry on. I hardly ever do cry, but when I do thanks for lending an ear to listen and a shoulder to lean on. I hate crying causes it opens you up to vulnerable. There were times I just couldn't hold it in anymore. I haven't truly truly cried since like November? but I did on this past Saturday. There were just a bunch of overwhelming factors, and I just couldn't take it anymore.

Just seeing their smiling faces makes my day sooo much better.

I just want to say, "thank you."



Here is some friendship quotes I would like to dedicate to my friends:

"IT IS A GOOD THING TO BE RICH, AND A GOOD THING TO BE STRONG, BUT IT IS A BETTER THING TO BE BELOVED OF FRIENDS." -----EURIPIDES

"FRIENDSHIP IMPROVES HAPPINESS, AND ABATES MISERY, BY DOUBLING OUR JOY, AND DIVIDING OUR GRIEF." -----JOSEPH ADDISON

"IT'S THE FRIENDS YOU CAN CALL UP AT 4 A.M. THAT MATTER." -----MARLENE DIETRICH

"WHENEVER YOU ARE IT IS YOUR OWN FRIENDS WHO MAKE YOUR WORLD." -----WILLIAM JAMES

"THE GREATEST GIFT OF LIFE IS FRIENDSHIP, AND I RECEIVED IT." -----HUBERT HUMPHREY

"TRULY GREAT FRIENDS ARE HARD TO FIND, DIFFICULT TO LEAVE, AND IMPOSSIBLE TO FORGET."-----G. RANDOLF

my week

Wow...this is going to be some week!



Sunday-6pm Super Bowl Party at the college

then whatever I want.....



Monday-10am to 2:50pm Class

6pm-8pm Training for the promotional thingy I am doing on Tuesday

then whatever I want.....



Tuesday-8am to 3pm I am doing a promotion at Staples

9:30am to 10:45am Class, but I can't go : (

11am Chapel (supposed to go for Mt. Laurel, but I can't since I will be at Staples doing a promotion)

4pm Tea at the President's House and Pictures (Mt. Laurel)

6pm to 8:30pm Night Class

9pm Black History Movie (Mt. Laurel)

then whatever I want.....



Wednesday-10am to 11:50am Class (my 1:30pm & 2pm is cancelled)

5:30pm Speech for Mt. Laurel

then whatever I want.....



Thursday-9:30am to 10:45am Class

then whatever I want.....



Friday-10am to 1:15pm Class (my 2pm is cancelled)

then whatever I want.....



Saturday- 12pm Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony

2pm & 4pm Bears' Basketball vs. West Virginia Tech

*crowning the winner at half-time of the men's game

**OUT AT NIGHT & hopefully celebrating!!!!!

what was i thinking when i wrote that previous blog?

(this refers to my previous blog titled "over it")



WTF?! I mean what was I thinking when I wrote that previous blog. I don't know. I have no clue. I guess I was just thinking about things? Who knows? Whatever it was... Well, I just had to get it off my chest. I felt like I could if I wrote it down. Wow, right after I posted it on Sunday (Jan. 28), I was over it. All it takes is writing it down. And I am glad!

I am doing sooooo much better now.